Welcome back to the last installment of part 1 of this fifth volume of the incomparable Charlotte Mason. I must admit this is the first time I have lamented reading Ms. Mason’s work. Chapter 8 was not my favorite and I am still ruminating exactly what my particular frustration is with Mrs. Jumeau. Chapter 9 was a struggle to read, though multiple child interruptions didn’t help, but ended well and brought me a bit to tears. Basically it was a rollercoaster reading this week and still so incredibly different from all her other writings.
However, when you take all 9 case studies and look at them from a top down view you see a focus on character training through habits within children and parenting practices. If you are looking for another summary of this particular volume, please check out this Take the 5th blog series from Karen Glass and Anne White. They do a much better job of summarizing and commenting on the readings.
The stories examine our conscious and subconscious desire for rewards, especially attention and affirmations of love. Charlotte Mason described these desires elsewhere as natural appetites.
Anne White, Take the Fifth Series
Chapter 7
This particular chapter follows young Fred and his persistent problem with forgetfulness in things that are not his particular favorite be it errands for mother, school work , or the like. Mother is discussing with the doctor, a family friend, this trifling problem and the doctor suggests waits for her to broach the idea of him helping her solve this particular quandary. Mother suggest he might grow out of his forgetfulness and its just part of youthful traits. The doctor makes a comment and mother infers he meant, “a fault left to itself must strengthen.” Throwing her hands up she wonders what she is possibly suppose to do about it!
As the doctor explains, the wonderful Mrs. Bruce begins to explain his wording in laymen’s terms.”He must have the habit of paying attention, so that he will naturally heed what he is told, whether he cares about the matter or not.”
Doctor suggests that had mother worked on this when Fred was a toddler it could have been prevented, and I think we can all guess mother’s frustration at this suggestion. She asks the doctor to expound. He firsts explains by giving the example of what could have been done when Fred was a baby, and then how to apply it today.
As a toddler the goal is to simply train them to focus on a given task a little more every day. If they can play with something for a minute, and are then distracted away the next day aim for two minutes of play before allowing them to move on. As this will not help an elementary aged child or older to attend to things that are outside their interest (like following mother’s commands) it is up to the mother to make the task interesting until the child begins to have the habit of remembering. He gives the example of having a chart of “remembers” and “forgets” for a week and the child is to tally each day aiming for the remembrances to “win” by weekend. In this way it is upon the child to train and motivate himself towards the habit.
The doctor declares, “but attention is the attribute of the trained intellect, without which genius makes shots in the dark.” He argues that attention is not a natural talent by something that is cultivated “simply the power of bending such powers as one has to the work in hand.” Attention is a skill that is needed for each of us to come upon success in life, and that skill is only created through proper training.
Chapter 8
Oh, Mrs. Jumeau. This is an unfortunate chapter about an unfortunate woman in a rather ordinary family. The basics of the story is that the mother was cheerful and energetic one day and the next would be down and out, but would rebound quickly with no trace of illness either later in the day or the next. The doctor sent for on the multiple occasions this happened, nothing could be done. Father and children were quite concerned.
The doctor consulted says this may be rather an opportunity of mind over matter and gives multitude of examples of others across Europe who have had similar maladies that were not feigned or even premeditated, but had also rebounded miraculously as it were. The doctor describes that this is a matter of unconscious desire for esteem (respect and admiration) and that the doting on the mother is giving her that esteem and thus she is able to rally. It ends succinctly with saying once she was made aware of the situation she is able to have victory over the issue.
Frankly while this is possible, as a mother of many this seems very odd on all accounts. Depression especially if postpartum could cause similar ailments, along with a myriad of other actual physical and chemical imbalances and to say she desires more attention and “esteem” seems insufficient and dismissive. However, it’s a make believe case study so I will try not to let it rile me up too much.
In the Idyll Challenge, discussions about Formation of Character have been heated. I have listened patiently as men and women have challenged the so-called insensitivity of Mason in Part I. “She just doesn’t get it,” they have said. She doesn’t “get” depression and mental health issues. A favorite target is “Poor Mrs. Jumeau.” Just by changing her thoughts, she can cure her problem and get out of bed? Ridiculous!”
The Story of Formation of Character by Art Middlekauf,
Chapter 9
This chapter also bothered me because of the troublesome children depicted, but maybe I was still stewing about Mrs. Jumeau. In this chapter we see a mother of a large family preparing for the beloved Christmas holidays. She is excited for all the festivities and seeing her children but is also a bit anxious that all that time away from routine and the norm will create tension and struggles. It boils down to some of her children had disagreeable habits that often lead to a sort of competition for mother’s love. The premise being that the rivalry and arguments from children often boil down to their own personal insecurity of parental love.
The answer lies in two fold, first that she would have diversions or activities to help keep them focused and the second to ensure they know they are all loved equally and none is left out. I think as she uses the word esteem again we are boiling all this down to a desire for respect, admiration and attention. The children begin to think mother doesn’t love them as much as so and so because they are naughty, so why not be naughty as you can’t possibly earn more love. Though this rings false to me as a mother and is where I began to falter.
The light in the story is the emphasis that we ought to, as parents, caution children against the bad habits and lead them to good while still letting them feel loved and esteemed. The concept of loving the sinner but hating the action of sin.
Rule none the less, but let your children feel and see and be quite sure that you love them
Charlotte Mason, Volume 5, pg 117
The final two paragraphs is what redeemed the work for me, as Ms. Mason encourages mothers to hug and make time for their older children specifically as well as making time for each individual child.
We do not suggest endearments in public, which the young folk cannot always abide. But, dear mother, take your big schoolgirl in your arms just once in the holidays, and let her have a good talk, all to your two selves; it will be to her like a meal to a hungry man. For the youths and maidens––remember, they would sell their souls for love; they do it too, and that is the reason of many of the ruined lives we sigh over. Who will break down the partition between supply and demand in many a home where there are hungry hearts on either side of the wall?
Charlotte Mason, Volume 5, pg 119
This is the redeeming paragraph. This is what we should strive for not only in the Christmas holidays, but for us mothers with out children at home daily and weekly.
See you next week as we begin part two, and hopefully I do not begin to throw my Charlotte Mason Volume 5 across the room as I was tempted to this week.
Thanks for joining along and happy reading!
Wholehearted Homemaking 
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